A long time ago (5/24) on a field far, far away (Horsham), TRx took on Reed. Reports from the game are hazy due to the time that has passed since then, as well as the happy hour held beforehand. In celebration of the great start to the season, as well as joy that the rapture came and went with about as much fanfare as JR showing up to a game, the team gathered at the Iron Abbey. While GLG tried to convince Terry he was only going over to prevent the rest of the team from drinking too much, in fact he led the onslaught, as all of the fans who had gathered there broke out in a chant of “GREG THE KEG,” owing to the similar size and weight of his bulbous dome to a keg of beer.
As Josh pounded multiple IPAs (India Pale Ale’s, not women of Indian-Pakistani-Asian descent), Bob consumed multiple orders of food, and Dempsey continued to toy with the lineup. Even JR made an shortlived appearance, before choosing ho’s before bro’s, and played with his Teva team instead of TRx. This made no one nervous, as despite JR expounding on his usefulness as a player to come off the bench and pinch hit in a big spot, TRx was more confident without him. Everyone knows that Bear sh*ts in the woods.
Once TRx finally finished the rest of the beer (and a few shots as well), they drunkenly stumbled towards the field. However, with Reed as the opponents (who TRx beat 13-3 in five innings last year) TRx could have cleaned out 5 more bars and still had a decent chance at victory. In the top of the first inning, TRx started off hot, with base hits by Josh, Brian, and GLG. Apparently, KB drank just enough to slow his reflexes so his usual foul balls into the woods on the left side of the field stayed just within the foul line, scoring two more runs. With four quick runs, TRx jumped out to an early lead. Things would continue like this for a while, as TRx average 4 runs per inning, and everyone on the team reached base at least once. GLG even had another “Oppo Boppo.”
When Aaron came up to bat, the team began to think maybe they had had too much to drink at the happy hour, as once again he batted lefty. The underreported story of the year is Aaron's attempt to ramake himself into a crafty lefty. Perhaps he was trying to show off for his family in the stands, or he had his own personal happy hour before the game, but after nearly striking out twice, let’s hope that Aaron’s memory comes back and he starts batting righty again before the playoffs.
In the field, Terry had complete command over Reed despite their attempts to draw walks instead of swinging the bat, as he racked up two strikeouts (including one to end the game). On one of the rare occasions that they did hit the ball, Aaron nearly trucked Steve to make a catch in the outfield, as Josh cheered him on. Later, with TRx up 16-0, KB made a diving attempt at a ground ball on the right side, despite being at least 30 feet from the ball. Perhaps he felt one of the ashes from one of Dempsey’s cigarettes on his shirt, and decided to stop, drop, and roll. But instead, all TRx could do was stop, drop, shut em down, open up shop. Gabriela also had a solid play at second.
Showing just how much they had to drink at the happy hour, GLG and Josh decided to switch positions mid-game, with Greg moving to the outfield and Josh manning shortstop. This almost led to disaster later, as TRx held a 16-0 lead in the bottom of the ourth and were attempting to get the shutout. After a gift call at first base to put one of Reed’s batters on, GLG showed his age, as his bulbous head slowed him enough that he was unable to reach a blooper to left. This allowed Reed to actually score a few runs, eliminating the chance for a shutout, as TRx had to settle for a 16-2 victory in four innings. Hopefully the league will change the rules again next year, so TRx can somehow beat Reed in three innings.
TRx is now 4-1 and takes on Softerware (2-1-1) on Monday (6/6).
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